Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Confidence

I'll touch on the reason behind the title of this post a little later. For now, I have some catching up to do. I have been pretty naughty about talking photos recently. I have a few photo shoots to edit and just take up all my extra time. That, and we moved. Sort of. The property we live on has 5 RV hookups. (I guess some of you might not know that my family lives in a 5th wheel trailer. You know what that is? It's seriously awesome. I love it!) Anyway, our wonderful neighbors decided to move. So we took their corner spot against the wall. So we have a bigger yard :) It still took all day. We organized our storage as well though. That took all morning. 


Here are a few photos I've taken with in the past little while. 

I started putting Kendal to work. She now washes my dishes and counter tops. She loves it! I'm going to let her do it all she wants. :)  

Kendal is a one man band. She put on a show for Mylee and I the other day. It was too cute to not grab a photo. She is seriously such a funny girl. 

 Remember my last post about my cooking? Here are the cinnamon and raisin bagels I created. First time I've really experimented with cooking and doing my own thing. 

Kendal went swimming on Saturday while we were moving things over. Her plastic pool had a crack in it so it made a mud pit. We found this.  

And lastly a beautiful sunset! I thought it was going to get bigger as the sun lowered, but it didn't. Still way pretty! Good old AZ sunsets :)


So back to the title of this post. Confidence. How many of you out there reading this have that? I don't. In anything I do I'm always doubting myself. Whether it be photography, dinner I cooked, the way I look anything! It's starting to get on my nerves. Before marriage I had confidence, or at least some. I played volleyball for one year in college and all through high school. So I was in great physical shape. I think that's the most I worry about these days. Having one kids changes your body, two kids....a whole new body. Now, I haven't been working out because I have this goal of breastfeeding Mylee longer than I did Kendal. Sad to say, I've achieved that. Sad because Mylee is only 5 months. And with Mylee I'm producing enough to store away. I pump for those of you who don't know my story. I always dislike reading new blogs where they tell a story but I don't know the history so I can't follow. Maybe I'll make a column about my life. A short summary. I like having people relate to me. Anyway, I like to get off subject a lot. So confidence. I am very embarrassed about my physical appearance. It's been over 110 here for the past 2 weeks now. RIDICULOUS!! Anyway, so Tanner and I have decided to compete. Not really. It's not a competition, more just finishing a REALLY hard event. 




Still confused on what we are doing? It's called "Tough Mudder" It's an obstacle course. 11 miles. In mud, freezing cold water, electric shock and a ton more. Click here to see the map of the Tough Mudder Tanner and I have signed up for! We have started the training this week and will continue hard until January. I am so excited to do this. I need this to get a fire started in me. I'm not a wuss and I'm tired of looking and feeling like one. (blogger was spazing out and I don't know why the text is all different.)

We are excited to be doing something together. We haven't done much as a couple, besides making and raising our kids. ;) Training so far this week has been a lot of fun. We swam laps yesterday until we couldn't breathe. (Which wasn't too many laps for me cuz I'm a horrible swimming even if I were in better shape.) 

Wish us luck and I'll continue to post about our training. I'd post our photos of our "before" the training started...but I'm not that brave. Same with weight...not that brave. I'll probably wait til January to show the results. 

5 comments:

Christine and Nick said...

I completely understand. I hate exercising indoors but we don't have money for a gym pass. so I have to have something to really motivate me to get in shape. Good luck! i'm sure you'll kill it!

Brooke said...

I completely understand your confidence issues. New wrinkles, saggy boobs, stretch marks, etc... it just stinks that having kids does that to our bodies. However, given the choice between no kids/beautiful body or kids/the body I have now... I'll take the body I have now. Definitely not beautiful but it's mine.

My husband and I are doing P90X. Well, we were anyway. So hard but so fun!

What you guys are training for sounds fun.

I didn't realize you live in a 5th wheel. That's pretty cool. Tight quarters for sure but hey, I'll bet you have a lot less JUNK than I do. THAT would be worth it right there.

Good luck with your training!

SSToone said...

I think you give everyone a little too much of the benefit of the doubt. Completely there with you on the confidence - though mine still is from catty mean jealous girls from basketball 7th grade on plus never having a boyfriend before Chris (not that specifically just the not feeling wanted thing). Somehow, I can't get over it and have minimal confidence in most things I do. I am always so worried about how others are perceiving me. Plus, I can usually only see the things I DIDN'T do or sort of did as opposed to what I did do or did well!

I am still trying to chip away at pounds though I've plateaued for some time now. I need to get back with doing WW ('cause heaven knows - I can exercise but if I eat to much it was worthless). For me, I live somewhere that exercise is really an indoor thing except a few months in the summer. I like my videos but need variation. I wish I had the time/motivation to do P90X which my brother Bryson does. I have a difficult time getting myself to actually work out when the kids are sleeping/occupied if I see other things that need to be done. Priorities//cost/benefit. My true love is basketball and I've been going Tuesday evenings to play with Chris and the Elder's Quorum. So great except when the lack of confidence/frustration monster creeps in! Sick cycle I've really struggled with lately.

Those mud runs are really the thing right now and look like a blast! Good luck with training! I'd love to do something like that with Chris but he's at a different level than I with ability and I HATE keeping him back or unchallenged because of me!

Sounds like things are going well!

Emily Buck said...

Thanks ladies! I'm really excited to finally have a reason to get in shape.

Brooke, I wouldn't trade my girls for anything...just wish I would have kept better shape before and after pregnancies. I'll get there! :)

Steph...I'm pretty sure Chris wouldn't mind working out with you even if you slowed him down. It's really hard to workout out with kids. Even just to get motivation. I too worry all the time about how others perceive me...that is also from how I was treated in grade school...funny how we can't let that go. mean girls.

Christine, I saw you just ran a 5k! Way to go!! That is so awesome!

Torey said...

Hooray for the Tough Mudder! Tanner and I are also signed up for it. 12:00 on Saturday.